I can have this after you die, right?

No pressure or anything. It’s just, you know, you are kinda getting up in years. I mean, I don’t want to point out the obvious but that medical alert bracelet you got there doesn’t exactly scream “Spring Chicken”, you feel me? What have you got, three years? Five? Ten, tops, right? Realistically, I mean. ‘Cause I think I might be able to hold out on buying a new one if that’s the case.

Look, all I’m saying is, you’ve reached that point in your life where you have to think about these things. One minute, you could be using the Push Button Stitch Selection on the LCD display of your Singer Confidence Stylist Sewing Machine. The next? BANG! You’re offering to do a few alterations to St. Peter’s robes. Wouldn’t you rather die with the comfort of knowing that your Singer Confidence Stylist Sewing Machine was going to someone who can appreciate all of its 70 stitch patterns? If we don’t clear this up now, Cousin Eddie could snatch it up in the battle over your estate and he doesn’t even know what a Class 15J Bobbin is, let alone what the Drop & Sew Bobbin System actually does. That would be a real tragedy, don’t you think?

You know what? We don’t have to talk about this now. You’re still a vibrant woman with a lot of good sewing times ahead of her, after all. But, if you don’t mind, I’d just like to put this little sticky note with my name on it just under the base. As a precaution, you understand. No rush on that whole death thing.

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