It’s starting to take a toll on me. There was a time when, if I missed a radio show I liked, I missed it.

That was it. Like say I was on the phone, or out to dinner, or snorkeling or something. Oh, well! So much for this week’s episode. I’ll catch it next time, right? Life goes on.

Yeah, that was how it used to go. But not anymore.

Now I can download podcast versions of those shows, and load them along with everything else I like to listen to, onto my Philips Spark mp3 player. I can listen to them at my convenience! Great, right?

Except that now, because I can listen to every episode of all my favorite programs, I feel like I have to listen to them. It’s become like homework. I’ve got hours and hours of the most scintillating talk radio weighing me down, and every downloaded episode is like another pressing item on my already too-long to-do list.

And I hardly ever get to snorkel anymore.

I just remember when I used to be able to turn on the radio and hear Bob Garfield or somebody and go “oh, it’s Bob Garfield! What a pleasant surprise! He and the rest of the ON THE MEDIA team will accompany me to the grocery store, where, regrettably, I must part ways with them to shop for the week’s provisions. Nonetheless, their brief company will make the journey all the pleasanter!”

Whereas now it’s like: “Aw, man, where was I in this episode of ON THE MEDIA? I think I had gotten to something like 24:15. Man, I’m so many weeks behind; I gotta get cracking on this stuff.” And I load up my Philips two-gig Spark mp3 player with back podcasts and listen while I wash dishes or something.

This feeling of guilt about not being caught up with my podcasts, it’s poisoning my relationship with the li’l Spark. Sometimes, if I’m going on a walk, or heading out to mow the lawn, I’ll want to fill the Spark’s two-gig NAND Flash drive with fun tracks. Ooh, like maybe Van Halen!

But I can’t. Too many THIS AMERICAN LIFEs to get through. Sigh.

It’s gotten to the point where I almost want to take my Philips two-gig Spark mp3 player and just chuck it off a bridge or something.

But I could never. I mean, just look at the little guy, staring up at me with his slightly bulgy rocking navigation lens. Hey there, little guy! What a cutie.

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