A picture is only worth a thousand words. An Optoma Projector, on the other hand, is worth at least a few hundred square feet.

How big is the apartment? Well, in traditional terms, about 230 square feet. But with an open mind and this Optoma projector, the space is practically unlimited! All you need to do is hook up your computer, choose an image or video of a room to project onto one of the blank walls, and voilà! You get a whole extra room that you never have to clean!

What kind of room can you project? That’s where it gets exciting: it’s totally up to you! This Optoma features Texas Instruments 1080p DLP® chipset and BrilliantColor™ technology, so whatever you choose, it’s going to look bright and crisp! Ever dreamed of a having a kitchen with dazzling granite counter-tops? Or a foyer with a baby grand and a fountain? Well, now you can. Digitally.

Although, fair warning, if you’re worried about continuity, choose a room that’ll look okay with spiders in it. Oh, they’re not here now, but come spider season, the walls will get thick with those little guys!

An example of something that’s worked in the past: the last tenant projected a dark swirling void on the wall! You couldn’t even see the spiders, and it really made the room come alive! In fact, that’s the whole reason the apartment’s open. I sent maintenance over to replace the battery in the smoke alarm and there was no trace of him – just a note that said something like, “The void is pulling me in. I must comply with its demands.” But hey, whatever! One man’s mysterious disappearance is another man’s dream pad, am I right?

So what do you say we get back to my office and start filling out this lease?

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