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CHICAGO - Police launched a raid on a suspected root beer speakeasy early Sunday morning in response to numerous reports that the club was engaging in illicit trafficking of root beer. Chicago's own Eliot Mess and several of his famed "Unsudsables" were on the scene to break up the bootlegging operation and several barrels of sweet, creamy root beer.
Inside, officers found numerous 1-liter bottles of the devil's pop, packets of Flavor Crystals, Root Beer Extract, Root Beer Yeast, No Rinse Cleaner, and more.
"Despite the inherent brilliance of trying to legislate morality, we're still running into scumbag operations like this," Mess said, adding "If I had a red cent for every Mr. Root Beer Kit with Refill Pack I've shattered on the pavement, by golly I'd have roughly 45 cents. Enough for a spacious three bedroom apartment in today's dollars."
Chicago's most notorious businessman, Mack Stabone, saluted the city's finest on their discovery and destruction of illicit soda. "Eh, it wasn't my operation. They'll never get me, unless it's on something stupid and seemingly trivial like erecting a retaining wall over three feet tall without a proper permit or something, but that'll never happen."
Features
Parental supervision required.
Root Beer Kit Features:
- Make 2 gallons of great tasting root beer in as few as 3 days
- The kit produces a very traditional old-fashioned tasting root beer that is a hit with adults and children alike
- Mr. Root Beer mixes are designed specifically to be carbonated in the bottle. Due to this carbonation process your root beer contains trace amounts of alcohol (about 1% ABW)
- Includes four reusable, amber, quart-sized PET (Polyethylene Terephthalate) beer bottles (PET plastic is FDA approved for food and beverage)
- Each kit also contains four reusable plastic screw caps w/pressure relief gasket
- These caps are designed to release excessive bottle pressures as a safety measure
- Also contains four self-adhesive stickers to apply a Mr. Root Beer label to your bottles
- Plastic funnel included to help transfer your root beer into bottles
- Making Root Beer Fun Guide contains complete 5-step instructions, science projects, and lots of root beer facts
- This product does not contain nuts or dairy and is naturally caffeine and gluten-free
- Bottle dimensions: 10.25"H x 3.5"D
Refill Pack Features:
- Refill kits yields an additional 2 gallons of root beer, for a total of 4 gallons
- Contains an additional bottle of root beer mix, two packets of flavor crystals, one packet of yeast and one packet of no-rinse cleanser
Warranty: 90 Day Woot Limited Warranty
Specs
In the box:
-
(1) Mr. Root Beer Homemade Root Beer Kit includes:
- (1) Bottle of Root Beer Extract
- (2) Packets of Flavor Crystals
- (1) Packet of Root Beer Yeast
- (2) Packets of No-Rinse Cleanser
- (4) Plastic 1-liter Bottles (PET)
- (4) Bottle Caps and Gaskets
- (1) Plastic Funnel
- (4) Root Beer Bottle Labels
- (1) Easy to follow Instructions/Fun Guide -
(1) Refill Pack includes:
- (1) Bottle of Root Beer Mix
- (2) Packets of Flavor Crystals
- (1) Packet of Root Beer Yeast
- (1) Packet of No-Rinse Cleanser
- Instruction Guide
Specs
In the box:
-
(1) Mr. Root Beer Homemade Root Beer Kit includes:
- (1) Bottle of Root Beer Extract
- (2) Packets of Flavor Crystals
- (1) Packet of Root Beer Yeast
- (2) Packets of No-Rinse Cleanser
- (4) Plastic 1-liter Bottles (PET)
- (4) Bottle Caps and Gaskets
- (1) Plastic Funnel
- (4) Root Beer Bottle Labels
- (1) Easy to follow Instructions/Fun Guide -
(1) Refill Pack includes:
- (1) Bottle of Root Beer Mix
- (2) Packets of Flavor Crystals
- (1) Packet of Root Beer Yeast
- (1) Packet of No-Rinse Cleanser
- Instruction Guide
Sales Stats
- Speed to First Woot:
- 0m 57.115s
Purchaser Experience
Purchaser Seniority
Quantity Breakdown
Percentage of Sales Per Hour
12 | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 |
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