If you had a Zune, like the one for sale over at Woot.com, you’d be able to use this Microsoft Zune Car Pack to enjoy it in your car. It’s great for when you’re driving like you’ve got a mission.

December 22nd, 2012. There’s nothing left. Nothing but the highway. And some stupid Mayans. But I’m thankful for that. Because without them, I’d have nothing on which I could take revenge.

They used to call me Mac. Since that was yesterday, they’d probably still call me Mac. But if they did, I’d politely correct them. Because that life is gone. Today, I’m the Interstate Warrior.

With my Zune Car Pack hooked up to my specially modified Ford Excursion, I’ve got the entertainment I need to survive the long, harsh trip to the other coast. I thank God that I bought a Microsoft Zune while there was still time. I remember that day. The sky was like blue cotton candy. My wife and my child were there. There were balloons, and hot dogs, and people playing baseball. But that’s all gone now. There’s no word for “hot dog” in Mayan.

My Zune car pack keeps my Zune charged on the go. It also has a built-in FM transmitter so I can listen to music through my car radio. It used to find an optimal station for broadcast all by itself no matter where I was. But now, I don’t have to care about that. I’m the only radio. There’s no word for “Clear Channel” in Mayan.

At night, I read the quick start guide and instruction manual. It’s not much, but it’s a link to the past. It’s the sort of thing I’d’ven’t thought to read to my kids back in November. I named the built-in magnetic connectors and dashboard grip pads after them. They’ll always be with me now.

That Zune I bought has enough music to take me across the country. Maybe there’s someone left. Someone fighting. I’m sure there’s a Mayan word for fighting. I don’t know what it is yet, but I’m gonna learn it. And then I’m gonna use my Zune Car Kit to play it over and over. And then take a break and listen to The Allman Brothers for a few miles. Then it’s right back to the word for fighting again.

Because I’m the Interstate Warrior now. I’ve got my Zune Car kit at my side. That’s all a man really needs. And pretty soon, those Mayans are gonna learn that I’ve got a calendar of my own. And that it’s already got “kick some Mayan ass” penciled in for December 28th.

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