A jack of some trades and a jack of some

Listen, Haan Floor Steamer. I'm not saying you're not great at steaming floors. I'm just saying that calling yourself "multi-purpose" is a little misleading.

Sure, you have a removable handheld steamer with versatile cleaning attachments. And yeah, you use Smart Steam Technology to kill 99.9% of germs, bacteria and dust mites. But in the end, you're still JUST steaming floors. That's not multi-purpose. That's uni-purpose.

If you were multi-purpose, you could steam something other than floors. Like, say, clothes. Or better yet, if you were truly a multi-purpose device, you could do something completely non-steam related. Like, teach me to dance the Bossanova or end world hunger.

Look, I don't mean to be belittling. Steaming completely sans chemicals is really admirable. And I'm actually really impressed by how easily your swivel head can maneuver in hard-to-reach spaces. But let's face it. No matter how beautifully, ironically, feverishly, caressingly, angrily or maniacally you steam the floors, you're still just steaming the floors.

It's totally fine. Every one of us has our special purpose, and this one is yours. Emphasis on the "one" there.

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