Emerson nice TVs right there. Emerson high-definition jobs, I reckon. You see ‘em on the Woot, didja? Emerson nice deals they got there on the Woot

In these unsure economic times, it’s easy to succumb to the fear, panic and wild-eyed, foamy-mouthed hysteria that are sweeping through the marketplace like the Horsemen of the Apocalypse through a daycare center. But isn’t there something you can do that’s more productive than hoarding dry goods? Or joining in the run on your local bank?

Of course there is. You can be part of the solution to our national crisis, and you can start by becoming a better-educated consumer.

Buying stuff takes a certain knowledge base. Let’s say you want to buy this TV. And take it from us, you do. In order to make an informed decision, you have to learn what a WXGA LCD display is, for example. This television’s got a 32-inch one. Is that good? It sure sounds like it! That’s probably education enough, but you could go ahead and look it up if you felt like being really thorough about it.

While you’re on that autodidact kick, familiarize yourself with technical terms like “1366×768 resolution” and “built-in ATSC/NTSC turner.” Learn what it means that this TV has an eight-MS response time and thousand-to-one contrast ratio.

Next, after you’ve learned those basics, go ahead and buy this TV.

Why? Well, to grease the wheels of our crucial e-commerce system and to inspire your community. A television set is in no way a necessity, so buying one is an act of faith that the economy is destined to recover and thrive.

When you bring your new HDTV up your driveway, your friends and neighbors will look up from burying their remaining cash supplies under the floorboards, peer out their front windows through the gaps between the sandbag barricades they’ve erected against looters and say “hunh. Maybe it’s not going to be so bad, at that.”

Now we know what you’re thinking. You’re looking at our shockingly low, low price and you’re thinking “hey, Woot: Wouldn’t it be better for the economy if you OVERcharged us for this fine piece of merchandise, thereby drawing more cash into circulation, and increasing your profits so you could create more jobs?” And you’re probably right. But as committed as we are to the nation’s overall economic well-being, we’re even more committed to you, personally, because we consider you one of our very closest and dearest friends, almost like family, really.

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