Blackbox M10 Noise Cancellation Headphones? They’re for everybody, everybody! Sorry, didn’t mean to type that twice.

“Hey, yo! How a fly girl like you ain’t be none impressed by this wicked fresh jacket, huh?”

“Oh… I’m sorry, early 90s white urban stereotype, are you talking to me? I had on my Blackbox M10 Noise Canceling Headphones so I couldn’t really hear you until you revved your bike. Isn’t that bad on the engine?”

“Ain’t hardly, girl! Damn! You got it goin’ on for DAYS! How about you hop on my M-beesh and we go, heh heh, ridin’ by your lake.”

“Well, normally I’d be all about a stranger with idiotic sex metaphors, but my father’s really serious about me getting home on time, especially in a dangerous middle-class small town like this. And plus, I want to finish listening to this Beethoven sonata. See, with my Blackbox M10 Noise Canceling Headphones, 85% of noise is cancelled. At least, that’s what they say. I’m not really sure how you could measure that. But it does let me hear things clearly at lower volumes, and that’s so much better for my ears.”

“Yeaaaaaaaah, girrrrl. I’m thinkin’ all about yerears. Ha ha. Yup yup. Whut?”

“Oh, wow. You’re talking about my behind? But in a way that lets you deny it later? Listen, I know it’s still the early 90s, but that’s really inappropriate behavior. So I’m going to put on my Blackbox M10 Noise Canceling Headphones again, okay? And I guess you should go and, I don’t know, get some more words written on your leather jacket. Maybe you could squeeze ‘2 fresh’ in between the ‘mad lova’ shoulder design and the ‘oh golly golly” on your collar.”

“Girl, you doggin’ my collar? Why you gotta be sweatin’?”

“Um, it’s a method of regulating body temperature? Seriously, guy, get lost. You talk like a crazy person. I just want to enjoy the clear bass and sharp highs of my Blackbox M10 Noise Canceling Headphones in peace.”

“Oh, yeah? Well, I got your number. Check out these guns, girl!”

“No, no, don’t take off your- oh, good lord.”

“Yeahhh, boy! I got flex, girl! Drop that zero and get with a hero!”

“I swear to you, the second they perfect cell phones, I’m calling the cops. I don’t care if it takes a decade. You don’t deserve to be walking free on the streets. Goodbye, don’t follow me, please.”

“Oh, hard to get, huh? How about I do a little rap? Girl, your Blackbox M10 Noise Canceling Headphones/They put me in a zone/Where I wanna take you home/Poo HAA poo HAA poo HAA pooooo. That’s okay, you ain’t gotta turn around. I’ll see you later! BOYYYYYYZ!”

“Drop dead, creep! My dad has a gun!”

“Yep yep. I think she likes me.”

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