With an Energizer Rechargeable 3-Watt LED Flashlight Kit, you’ll have a car charger and these cool red and green covers that make it look like an old 3D monster movie. Just be careful if that gives you any ideas…

Oh, really, Justin? Out of gas? Wow, how terrible. Just two sixteen year olds trapped out here in the woods under a full moon? Well. It’s a good thing I put a Energizer Rechargeable 3-Watt LED Flashlight in my purse before we left. Yes, that’s right, in and in fact, it’s an Energizer Rechargeable 3-Watt LED Flashlight Kit. And did you notice me using the cigarette lighter before? I wasn’t just plugging in my cellphone, I was charging my Energizer Rechargeable 3-Watt LED Flashlight Kit. That’s right, my Energizer Rechargeable 3-Watt LED Flashlight can be charged in a car, as well as through a regular wall plug. So now, here it is, see? It’s all ready to turn on! That’ll sure help us out here, won’t it?

What’s that, Justin? Don’t turn it on? Oh, it’ll ruin our night vision and then we’ll get lost in the woods as we walk? Well, I sort of figured you’d say that. In fact, it’s such an obvious thing to say that the people who designed the Energizer Rechargeable 3-Watt LED Flashlight figured you’d say it too. That’s why they’ve added this red cover and this green cover that fit over the flashlight. See? Snaps right in place! And look at that, Justin, now we can see perfectly well in the dark! What? Don’t shine the Energizer Rechargeable 3-Watt LED Flashlight Kit all over the place like I’m doing? Well, okay, what about if I just shine it over in one specific place, like right… here?

Hey, look at that! A guy who looks just like Vincent Price reading from a script! And a whole bunch of dancers in zombie makeup! And is that… oh, I think it is! A full band, hiding in the woods, right beside a sound man! Hey, fellas, how’s it going! You think you can give a girl a ride home? See, Justin here has run out of gas. I won’t need a lot of room, it’s just me and my purse and my Energizer Rechargeable 3-Watt LED Flashlight Kit. Oh, and can we bring the guy who looks like Vincent Price with us? He’s starting to cough and he looks terrible. Honestly, Justin, it’s so irresponsible to bring an old man out into these cold, dark woods just to try and scare me with a dance number. Didn’t you even think? Didn’t you consider how often this happens to women these days? Maybe it was cool and novel back in 1983 or something, but not today.

What? You want to keep my Energizer Rechargeable 3-Watt LED Flashlight Kit? You still have to walk to find gas? Honestly, Justin. You didn’t even think to hide a gas can in the trunk for later? What if I’d been stupid enough to fall for this whole thing? You’d expect me to get up and walk six miles after we… fine, here, just take it, I don’t have time to argue. Guys, hey, band members, we’ve got to get this old man some soup or some coffee or something. Does anyone have a scarf or a jacket we can give him? Oh, sir, I am so sorry. Yes, you’ll still be paid, I promise you. In fact, I’ll make sure Justin pays you double, isn’t that right, Justin? Sir, would you like to sit up in the front of the band’s van? No, no, I’ll be fine, I’ll curl up in the back with the drummer. No, Justin, you can’t be a chaperone, you’ve got to find gas for your car. Honestly, what trouble do you think I’ll get in with a twenty five year old musician, anyway? You’re so immature. Really, just grow up.

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