They're calling this one the Storm of the century.
Breaking news from the weather station (that's what we call the conference room on the 3rd floor): Hope you're stocking up on French toast supplies, folks, because this one's gonna be a doozy.
We've seen spit wads the size of golf balls dinging the boss's door, and shredder paper raining down in the stairwell. It's been going on since the late shift started without overtime, and there's no end in sight. DO NOT stay where you are. If at all possible, finish up your work as quickly as possible and get the heck out of there.
Latest reports show that a cold front is sweeping in from the north (Kathy's office) and will soon collide with an intern playing paper football when they're supposed to be typing the minutes. Expect violent 360° swivel-action and furious castors as Hurricane Kathy makes her way across the lobby and over to the copy center to print said intern's dismissal letter.