Oh, no! That thing we had sold out! So out of our
desperate attempt to be rich love for giving you options, we've added a bonus sale for today. Consider it a gift to us from your wallet to all of you who were hoping for something like this. This is your chance to help us look good to our bosses get a little something for yourself, okay? Thank you You're welcome.
I've distracted myself with funny cat GIFs. I've tried jabbing myself with a cat claw every time I even start to think about it. I've put cats in my ears and said LA LA LA I CAN'T HEAR YOU when people have tried to tell me about it. But reality and the County Department of Health have forced me to acknowledge that my cats, my widduw kittumkinsies, my sweet furry little cherubs - my cats - excrete solid and liquid waste from their digestive systems.
Ugh. I can't believe I just said something so vulgar.
But I'm being brave. I'm being a grown-up about this. I've even acquired a Catiti Jumbo Hooded Cat Pan for them to do their filthy business in. At least I don't have to see it. Or, thanks to the carbon-impregnated filter, smell it. Except when I clean it out, I guess. Whew. I can do this. I can do this.
While I'm accepting uncomfortable biological realities, I should probably go ahead and talk to Mom about how I got made. Wish me luck, guys.