Delta Children Haven Dresser

Before opening the box, go out and get yourself a case of your favorite beer. Then carefully open the box, remove the dresser components and place the box to the side. Gather your tools and spend the next hour or so assembling the dresser. Save the drawers for last. Open a fresh beer then insert the first drawer carefully. Attempt to pull the drawer back out to test it, allowing it to become hopelessly jammed. Go to the Delta Children's website to learn that this is a horrendous design flaw that they are aware of yet continue to sell the dresser. Order the repair kit, which apparently takes more than a month to receive, watch the video and then open another beer to calm your nerves. Placing your head in to the dresser then attempt to free the jammed drawer. Have yet another beer and make sure to call your friends who are mechanics, carpenters and safe crackers and ask them to free the drawer. Give them some of your beer. When they fail, insert your hammer (not a listed tool but necessary) and proceed to smash the drawer in an aggressive sideways motion, allowing it to come apart and the individual pieces to be removed. Have another beer and put a bandage on your hand which you probably cut while smashing the drawer. Carefully dismantle the entire dresser while you partner contacts Amazon for a return (maybe give them a beer as well as they may need it) and ask them to print the return label. Place the dresser parts back in to the box, seal it and affix the return label. Save your last beer for the FedEx driver as a tip because they will have to lug this 70lb piece of crap back to their truck. They will appreciate the beer. When the replacement drawer kit arrives via US Mail about six weeks later be sure to carefully open it up and immediately throw it in to the garbage. Do not attempt to use it as a bottle opener as it does not work (another design flaw). You will not get a working dresser from Delta Children but you might get a good buzz from the beer. Good luck and be safe.