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You may be able to slam dunk, score a goal, do the Fosbury Flop, but until you're doing those things while wearing athletic clothing, let's face it: you're not really an athlete. Don't fret, though. We've got lots of athletic apparel for you, so buy some of this, put it on while being athletic, and just like that, look at you! You're an athlete!
Have you ever seen a tie score a touchdown? Or a pair of pleated slacks go off the high dive? Of course not! That's not athletic apparel. That's just apparel. Actually, should we even be calling a tie apparel? Or does it fall under some other more specific category? Hmmm, not sure. Now what were we talking about?