The Jerky Boyz

It turns out that beef jerky makes terrible prank calls. 

[THE FOLLOWING IS A TRANSCRIPT FROM SWEET BABY RAY'S FAILED 'THE JERKY BOYZ' CASSETTE TAPE, RELEASED IN 2010. THE PROJECT FAILED WHEN IT BECAME CLEAR THAT BEEF JERKY WAS INCAPABLE OF SPEECH, AND THEREFORE INCAPABLE OF "PRANKING."]

PRANK #1

VICTIM 1
Hello?

JERKY

VICTIM 1
Hello?

JERKY

VICTIM 1
Anybody there?

JERKY

VICTIM 1
OK then.

PRANK #2

VICTIM 2
Hello, Andy?

JERKY

VICTIM 2
Hello? I saw this 212 area code, and I think Andy has a 212 area code, but the caller ID didn't recognize it. Andy?

JERKY

VICTIM
Well, Andy, I can't hear you, but just tell your brother to meet me at Port Authority at 6:15. I think it's the south wing.

JERKY

PRANK #3

VICTIM 3

JERKY

VICTIM 3

JERKY

VICTIM 3

[VICTIM 3 WAS ALSO JERKY, AS IT TURNED OUT.]

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Features

Bridgford beef jerky is made from the finest ingredients available. Always tender with savory flavor, it is low in fat and carbohydrates, making it the ideal choice for any busy lifestyle or health-conscious consumer. The combination of bold seasonings, the best ingredients and tender cuts of premium beef slowly smoked to perfection makes Bridgford America's best tasting beef jerky.

  • Includes (6) 3-ounce bags
  • No refrigeration required
  • Best by Feb 2014
  • Made in USA

Shipping Note: Eligible for shipping to all 50 states

 

Specs

Nutrition Facts
  Amount % Daily Value
Serving Size 1 oz.  
Servings per Container 3  
Calories 90  
Calories from Fat 10  
Total Fat 1g 2%
Saturated Fat 0g 0%
Trans Fat 0g 0%
Cholesterol 25mg 8%
Sodium 480mg 20%
Total Carbohydrate 6g 2%
Dietary Fiber 0g  
Sugars 6g  
Protein 11g 22%
Vitamin A   0%
Vitamin C   0%
Calcium   0%
Iron   6%
Folate   0%

Ingredients: Beef, water, seasoning blend (salt, brown sugar, sugar, mustard, monosodium glutamate, dehydrated garlic, red pepper, sodium erythorbate, onion powder, spice extractive), brown sugar, Sweet Baby Ray's jerky base (vinegar powder [dextrin, modified food starch, vinegar solids], tomato powder, pineapple juice power [maltodextrin, pineapple juice], Worcestershire sauce powder [distilled vinegar, molasses, corn syrup, salt, caramel color, garlic powder, sugar, spices, tamarind, natural flavor and sulfiting agents], maltodextrin), natural smoke flavor, spices, and not more than 2% silicon dioxide added to prevent caking, sodium nitrite.  May contain wheat and soy.

In the box:

(6) Bridgford Sweet Baby Ray's Beef Jerky, 3oz.

Sales Stats

Speed to First Woot:
1m 26.774s
First Sucker:
jgrant73
Last Wooter to Woot:
mthutson

Purchaser Experience

  • 3% first woot
  • 4% second woot
  • 24% < 10 woots
  • 24% < 25 woots
  • 45% ≥ 25 woots

Purchaser Seniority

  • 2% joined today
  • 1% one week old
  • 1% one month old
  • 12% one year old
  • 84% > one year old

Quantity Breakdown

  • 68% bought 1
  • 17% bought 2
  • 15% bought 3

Percentage of Sales Per Hour

16%
7%
5%
2%
4%
4%
9%
10%
11%
10%
9%
7%
5%
3%
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12 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11

Woots by State

zero wooters wootinglots of wooters wooting

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Sweet Baby Ray's Beef Jerky - 6 Pack
$17.99 Sold Out Sporting Goods
$17.99 USD false 1 Retail EA
1 3
Woot! Sellout.Woot
4121 International Pkwy Carollton TX 75007 U.S.A.