WootBot


quality posts: 14 Private Messages WootBot

Staff

PowerBalance Wristbands...again

As your many, many, many, many, MANY angry posts in our forums every time these come up have pointed out to us, we dun goofed pretty hard with these. Sadly, though, we goofed pretty big so we've got a lot of them. Maybe you could buy some and destroy them in a YouTube video showing what a hardcore skeptic you are?
PowerBalance official site



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ThunderThighs


quality posts: 565 Private Messages ThunderThighs

Staff

Thunderson and I are huge Survivor fans. Are you?

If so, did you know that Michael Skupin wore a Power Bracelet in the latest season of Survivor Philippines? Take a look:



You might remember that Mike was evacuated from Survivor: The Australian Outback when he burned his hands after passing out into the camp fire.

He returned this season with the addition of a special bracelet. Let's see how much balance this bracelet brought Mike:



Hmmmmm.



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irqzero


quality posts: 3 Private Messages irqzero

Buy these. They'll make you perform better. If you believe that, and are wearing one if you come interview at my co, I can cut the interview short, so as not to waste time.

Ghost Watcher


quality posts: 0 Private Messages Ghost Watcher

If you really, really, really want one of these. I have a deal for you! This is an Xmas special ONLY. Free Shipping! No handling charges! Just go to the front door of your house/apartment/cave/bomb shelter and open door/large stone/hatch and throw $5 out into your yard/street/field/abandoned missile silo. You will end up with the same results to your 'being' that the "PowerBalance" will give you and you get it NOW! No waiting. It could be yours today. Hurry! Hurry! Hurry! Act now - this offer expires soon. Don't be the last on your block to get in on this deal - Be the 1st.

I am watching...

TurboFool


quality posts: 1 Private Messages TurboFool

Mall kiosk salespeople LOVE PowerBalance bracelets. Any time they see a customer wearing one they know they can sell them ANYTHING.

yankeesrule


quality posts: 5 Private Messages yankeesrule

Next time woot has a Bag O' Crap on sale, I think I'm going to skip purchasing because the chances of getting like, 10 of these things is WAY too high

miken927


quality posts: 122 Private Messages miken927

The wristbands, they do nothing!



Okay, sorry for the mixed metaphor.


------------------
I Bet on Sky

windswept


quality posts: 3 Private Messages windswept

I just want to say, as one of the prior angry posters, I appreciate that Woot has taken a less defensive tone and acknowledged the craptastic ripoff nature of this non-product.

I wish you weren't still selling them, but I can live with you acknowledging the lousy decision you made to buy them.

Pax.

seangstewart


quality posts: 0 Private Messages seangstewart
miken927 wrote:The wristbands, they do nothing!



Okay, sorry for the mixed metaphor.



Thank you for this.

mike74511


quality posts: 0 Private Messages mike74511

Scam scam scam

wisenekt


quality posts: 29 Private Messages wisenekt
ThunderThighs wrote:Thunderson and I are huge Survivor fans. Are you?

If so, did you know that Michael Skupin wore a Power Bracelet in the latest season of Survivor Philippines? Take a look:



You might remember that Mike was evacuated from Survivor: The Australian Outback when he burned his hands after passing out into the camp fire.

He returned this season with the addition of a special bracelet. Let's see how much balance this bracelet brought Mike:



Hmmmmm.



Too bad he didn't realize that he needed one on his left side as well to balance things out.

rhycochet


quality posts: 16 Private Messages rhycochet

kudos to the write-off for this promo...i can sense your pain. i was one of those that posted very angrily the previous time these came on.

but now it's obvious to me just how much you guys don't even wanna market these with your name tagged and associated with them. but your powers that be just have to get these...gone.

i feel for you, editors and mods in charge of marketing these rubber bands...merry christmas and may your next promo be less soul-crushing.

happypuppy


quality posts: 5 Private Messages happypuppy

Ah, I remember these! Unfortunately, you're pretty screwed without all 8 power ups. You'll need them to beat Sigma.

theguruguys


quality posts: 276 Private Messages theguruguys

For those who haven't heard the story:

The NBA signed an endorsement agreement with these scam artists. Mark Cuban, who had previously discredited the 'Negative Ion' crap on Shark Tank, would have none of it:




Power Balance was also sued to the tuned of 57 million dollars which caused Power Balance to basically admit their product is a scam.

xed101


quality posts: 0 Private Messages xed101

Funny, it says size is fully customizable, but I find only one size, & that's extra large. Is there any way to change the size?

mustbechris


quality posts: 8 Private Messages mustbechris
xed101 wrote:Funny, it says size is fully customizable, but I find only one size, & that's extra large. Is there any way to change the size?



I'm concerned that your inquiry stems from a genuine desire to purchase, own, and wear a set of these. Please re-think your options here.

Also, while Woot's acknowledgement that this crap is crap brings enjoyment to my life, it's offset by my keen awareness that sellout.woot will be carrying these through at least August.

xed101


quality posts: 0 Private Messages xed101
mustbechris wrote:I'm concerned that your inquiry stems from a genuine desire to purchase, own, and wear a set of these. Please re-think your options here.

Also, while Woot's acknowledgement that this crap is crap brings enjoyment to my life, it's offset by my keen awareness that sellout.woot will be carrying these through at least August.



I just think they're neat regardless of the "special performance enhancement" claims, & for $11 (with shipping) who cares anyway? So, back to my original post, is there any way to change the size?

clanecks


quality posts: 16 Private Messages clanecks

Is the buyer responsible for this debacle still working? ;)

And out of curiosity, what's the roi on power balance so far for woot?

I am not responsible for this post.

PhilCarr


quality posts: 3 Private Messages PhilCarr

OOhh!! They have one in camo! I hear they make you a better hunter. Your aim is steadier, vision is sharper, and it masks your scent so the deer can't smell you if you're upwind. Sounds more like a "Perk" from Call of Duty...

umzy


quality posts: 3 Private Messages umzy

Noticed my pet Unicorn was walking with a limp yesterday. It's a bear trying to find a vet that will even treat a unicorn, so this XL Power Balance will save me some $$$. Also have a Yeti with a birthday coming up, so I'm in for two. Thanks Woot!

ThunderThighs


quality posts: 565 Private Messages ThunderThighs

Staff

umzy wrote:Noticed my pet Unicorn was walking with a limp yesterday. It's a bear trying to find a vet that will even treat a unicorn, so this XL Power Balance will save me some $$$. Also have a Yeti with a birthday coming up, so I'm in for two. Thanks Woot!



See, that's the kind of "thinking outside the box" that we need more of around here. +1



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drewy813


quality posts: 8 Private Messages drewy813

Might as well make them a buck. I might just use them for gag gifts....

greenro


quality posts: 0 Private Messages greenro

These things really DO work! Ever since I started wearing them last year, I haven't died...not even once!!! AND I survived the end of the world!

I'm giving one to all my friends, Oprah-style - You get a band! You get a band! You get a band!

318197


quality posts: 1 Private Messages 318197

"Maybe you could buy some and destroy them in a YouTube video showing what a hardcore skeptic you are?"

Lol, Oh Woot!, you've won my heart back.
<3

csdillon


quality posts: 0 Private Messages csdillon

Is it true that if the Woot Warehouse holding these wristbands was hit by an earthquake; there would be no structural damage? The building itself probably glows of awesomeness at night time.

lotsofgoats


quality posts: 3 Private Messages lotsofgoats

At least over-order on a food item, so then you can eat your shame.


Tisk tisk.

mitrebox


quality posts: 3 Private Messages mitrebox

Magic Johnson has been wearing one of these since 1992.

What?

aleph


quality posts: 0 Private Messages aleph

When will you be re-wooting the snake oil? I've run out of my supply. These bracelets are awesome! I have one for each limb! Now I can walk on my hands with mastery.

inkycatz


quality posts: 105 Private Messages inkycatz
aleph wrote:When will you be re-wooting the snake oil? I've run out of my supply.


All depends on the snakes.

I'm just hanging out, really.

Thergrim


quality posts: 0 Private Messages Thergrim

Buy these and scam your friends. Trade them for drinks at the bar.

This video will show you how to perform the power band scam tricks. But I just use whatever is handy "power straws", "power coasters", "Power wads of napkin", etc.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XpLt0oUWfOk

heartburnkid


quality posts: 4 Private Messages heartburnkid

I wish you had posted this a month ago. Would have made a great White Elephant gift.

ThunderThighs


quality posts: 565 Private Messages ThunderThighs

Staff

heartburnkid wrote:I wish you had posted this a month ago. Would have made a great White Elephant gift.



Oh, darlin' they were for sale a month ago on Woot but everyone was so full of rage-quit to see the possibility of white elephant gifting.



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alanhwoot


quality posts: 38 Private Messages alanhwoot

It's not much of a scam when they aren't actually making any claims for them (anymore). Which is also why they're on a closeout site for $6 instead of $60.

So it's a plasticy thing with a hologram you can wear on you're wrist... and that's pretty much it. $6 or not is up to you.

faryl


quality posts: 0 Private Messages faryl
ThunderThighs wrote:Thunderson and I are huge Survivor fans. Are you?

If so, did you know that Michael Skupin wore a Power Bracelet in the latest season of Survivor Philippines? Take a look:



You might remember that Mike was evacuated from Survivor: The Australian Outback when he burned his hands after passing out into the camp fire.

He returned this season with the addition of a special bracelet. Let's see how much balance this bracelet brought Mike:



Hmmmmm.


Trying to remember if his son wore one when he got beat up by the palm tree.

Maybe the wristband repelled those final votes.

ThunderThighs


quality posts: 565 Private Messages ThunderThighs

Staff

faryl wrote:Trying to remember if his son wore one when he got beat up by the palm tree.

Maybe the wristband repelled those final votes.



He said his sons gave it to him and that they all wore them. It was like a bonding thing, not worn for the Power Balance thing.



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To contact Customer Service, use the SUPPORT form at the top of every woot page
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markriddle


quality posts: 4 Private Messages markriddle

I think they should take these and wrap them around the BASE of the BRAINS of those that produced/marketed these things.

Only problem is getting those belt buckles undone and dealing with pesky zippers.

wisenekt


quality posts: 29 Private Messages wisenekt
markriddle wrote:I think they should take these and wrap them around the BASE of the BRAINS of those that produced/marketed these things.

Only problem is getting those belt buckles undone and dealing with pesky zippers.



Now that is some thinking outside the box. I would have never considered PowerBands to be a sex toy.

aeneasvt


quality posts: 1 Private Messages aeneasvt

Thank you, Woot, for admitting that this was a bad call. I appreciate your candor and, unlike nearly all the other posters, am disinclined to twist the knife.

Have a nice day.

narquespamley


quality posts: 24 Private Messages narquespamley

Put the Power of Placebo on your wrist!

What's Placebo, you ask?

I heard it was one of those wonder herbs, kind of like Ginseng.

Best of all, the Power of Placebo is Scientifically Proven!

vipermjb


quality posts: 40 Private Messages vipermjb
irqzero wrote:Buy these. They'll make you perform better. If you believe that, and are wearing one if you come interview at my co, I can cut the interview short, so as not to waste time.



Mocking and judging people based on what they wear? Sounds like you're a great hiring manager.