You can't have exciting dreams without exciting sheets.
In my dream I am on a raft made of logs floating down the river. I am alone, with only my Microfiber Sheet Set for company. The wind is warm and I can smell the tigers on the riverbank. I cannot see them, there are only shadows that rumble and watch me as I go.
I gather my Microfiber Sheet Set in my arms and press it to my face. I can feel the thread count sliding down my cheeks and over my lips and my eyes. There are small bubbles arising from the river, and I am going faster.
I notice a hum that comes from the riverbank and I know it is not the tigers, nor the wind, but a man. He has a carved reed against his mouth and he blows across it to make a tune. It is his tribute to the Microfilber Sheet Set, which I have stolen from him. He mourns it. I feel joy at my good fortune.
The river moves me further. I can feel the wind through my Microfiber Sheet Set. I can feel the warm sun across my face. The hum grows louder. The tigers grow closer.