Don't go bar-king up the wrong sound tree.
Use these: To deliver heart-pounding sound to your home.
Don't use these: As a pacemaker.
Rejected names for these products include: NoisePlank.
Benjamin Franklin said of this: “Listen up, Dog: There’s no better way to enjoy your jams! Get up on that, my nephew!”
If you traveled to the past, people would think this was a: Faerie Dungeon.
In a tell-all biography, it was revealed that these soundbars: Can’t stand the word “audiophile.”